I problemi delle donne sono più semplici del manuale di istruzioni che portano con sè – il loro peso. Le risoluzioni dei problemi delle donne sono ancora più elementari, e per questo dirompenti, distruttivi: l’amante, la dieta, i soldi. I figli – quelli che ci sono, quelli che non ci sono, quelli che non si volevano. Non sono sicura di voler mettere il marito qui, lo sposterei piuttosto sotto la categoria “sforzi sovraumani per ottemperare ai miei doveri antichi”, oppure anche quella “la mia possibilità di essere felice senza accorgermene”. Rimedio, come balsamo per una ferita, come soluzione veloce ad un problema impellente: questo non è un marito. E nemmeno un fidanzato.
Le donne si sentono minacciate dalle altre donne, e questo è un buono schema della natura – funziona. Dice che quando hai trovato il pinguino reale che siederà sulle uova mentre tu vai in cerca di pesce, devi fare di tutto per tenertelo stretto. Quindi la pinguina non accetta di buon grado, ad esempio, che un’altra pinguina discinta le stia in casa, o che il maschio lasci l’uovo allo scoperto per fare il pavone – uccelli sono comunque – con un’altra. Magari più giovane, magari meno ricca, magari assai più brutta, non importa: la quantità è maschia, e continuo a non trovarci nulla di male.
Le donne, inoltre, non sanno le regole della buona convivenza umana: inutile vendersi per un Vuitton quando si è un portafoglietto di eco pelle, o per un samaritano quando si è un imperatore nudo. La storia è quella: un universo non è abbastanza per due donne sole, a meno che una delle due non sia (più) brutta, (più) grassa o omosessuale. Negare il fatto è possibile ed allettante, ma andando a contare le amiche che si frequentano di più ci accorgeremo che sono quelle che non ci minano mai sui punti forti. Ci completano, certo, ci somigliano, ovvio, ci amano, ma non sono pericolose – quelle si conservano per un venerdì sera, quando ci si è appena lasciate.
Nel dubbio cerca di fare un esercizio, E. Mettiti allo specchio e comincia: io sono questa. Io sono proprio questa qui. Io non sono quello che so fare – anzi. Io non sono i vestiti che porto ma amo far vedere il monastero da cui provengo. Io sono io, e tu sei tu, e io ti amo molto ma occhio. Io amo le cipolle ma anche le scarpe rosse. Io sono completa come un rotondo e sfuggente come una faccia di prisma: guai a darmi una fodera sola. Io sono quello che hai cercato per anni e che ti ho concesso, con gioia infinita, di possedere. Io amo perdermi nelle notti di Cabiria, ma so tutto di tachipirina, preiscrizioni, pannoloni, orli rotti, umiliazioni e glorie istantanee. Io non so scrivere un pezzo non perchè non mi riesce, ma perchè mi annoia. Sì, mi annoia. Ma mi piace stare su un palco – e ci sto come una lampada liberty accesa in un negozio senza luci a soffitto. Io detesto l’Umbria, e sai perchè? E’ come la Toscana, ma troppo verde, troppo rustica, troppo improvvisamente florida. Ecco, ripetiti, io sono come la Toscana. Quelle sono come il Molise. Con tutto il disrispetto possibile e dovuto.
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Non posso aggiungere altro….se non che sto ancora piangendo dopo averla letta…grazie sei un dono prezioso per me,sei una culla dolce di sera,al mare o in montagna perchè le tue carezze sono sempre al momento giusto .ti voglio un bene sincero,in poco tempo hai capito quello che cè fuori da questo guscio a volte bello a volte brutto.un abbraccio che durerà sempre