Sì, è vero, avevi lasciato lo spazzolino da me. E’ che non me ne ero accorta.

Juanita de Paola

Ti presenti una sera con tutte le cose che non avevi detto (saputo dire) quando ci eravamo incontrati la prima volta, e ti piazzi sul divano a parlare come una macchinetta, incurante del fatto che ho sonno. Mi guardi intensamente gli stinchi: ho i peli lunghi sulle gambe; ma tu davvero credi che io passi la vita ad accarezzare il silk-epil? E soprattutto, sai che alle dieci io mangio il budino di cioccolata per fare i sogni belli? No. Hai l’occhio a bracco e la pancia di chi ha mangiato molto quando faceva molto sport: non ne fai più, deduco. Ti sei anche stempiato, che di per sè non mi dà nessuna noia, se non fosse che continui a passarti la mano nel ciuffo, che è solo nella tua memoria – un pò come quando senti lo stimolo al piede, e ti hanno amputato la gamba.

Ti sei lasciato con R, che ha ventanni meno di te, e sei distrutto. E questo è l’unico motivo per cui sei qui: non puoi andare dai tuoi amici, che hai rinnegato per stare con lei, perchè ti renderebbero la pariglia. Non puoi andare dalle tue amiche, perchè quelle brutte sono sposate o hanno sedici figli e comunque il loro compagno non ti può vedere. Non puoi andare da quelle carine perchè ci sei stato assieme, e si creerebbe quell’atmosfera così, imbarazzante dopo i trenta, che non hai il fisico di reggere stasera. Quindi vieni qui, dall’unico amico maschio con le tette che hai: io.

Mi ricordo ancora quando tua mamma chiamò a casa mia, per sapere se ero fidanzata: all’epoca stavi con la delfina di un imprenditore, la tua custode e genitrice non voleva interferenze – non ce n’erano, hai il petto a piccione, non so se mamma sa gli effetti deleteri di questa conformazione. Ci teneva. Lei com’è finita? Sta a Londra, certo, e dove se no. E tu? Al Borgo di Sopra. Certo, e dove se no. Accanto a mamma.

Mi chiedi se puoi rimanere a dormire, che starai sul divano. Certo dico. C’è ancora il tuo spazzolino da qualche parte, dici, a quel punto credo di averlo usato per farmi le unghie o scrostare il lavandino. Eccoti la coperta di Minnie e Topolino, è della mia bambina, profuma di buono. Questo è il telecomando e di là, nel frigo, ci sono dolcetti e scherzetti: fai come se fossi a casa tua, purchè tu non faccia casino o non ti senta portato a superare la porta del salotto in direzione camere, nel qual caso dovresti ingaggiare un investigatore privato per ritrovarti la sacca là sotto. Al mattino non sei ancora sparito e ora mi ricordo perchè fra noi non è mai successo niente: non hai ritmo.

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